Because This Happened
by nothing-rhymes-with-ianto
Summary: Jack has always been John's controller, his protector. John has a moment of freedom in a bar. After, though, John feels some sense of defencelessness snap, morphing into anger and violence.


_Written for the "roofied" square of angst_bingo._

* * *

The bar in Adinaxia was supposed to be safe, John thinks miserably. It was supposed to be peaceful, not like the other places where you had to keep your guard up. He tries to sit up, but it feels like his whole body is frozen, the world around him is looping and spinning, and if he wasn't paralyzed, he'd be sick. The sound of Jack's voice in the hall makes his heart leap.

After a rather botched Time Agency training mission, Jack suggested they go on a little vacation, go to Adinaxia where it was peaceful. The other planets they usually relaxed on were full of violence and sex and fighting. What Jack wanted was a good drink, a good flirt that went nowhere, and a moment or two to let his guard down. John was inclined to agree.

So the bar in Adinaxia was a good choice. Adinaxia was known to be peaceful. The inhabitants rarely disturbed each other, and tourists were given quite a lot of care. Bars were meant for enjoying yourself, and fighting wasn't allowed. Nor was fucking, unless it was slow and quiet and in a bed in one of the rooms in the back of the bar.

"How are you liking this?" Jack asked over his drink.

"It's…different," John replied. "I don't know how much I like peacetime, now that I'm here."

"Oh, shut it and enjoy yourself. At least here you don't have to keep looking over your shoulder."

"There is that."

Jack drained the rest of his drink and tapped the table with both hands. "Listen, I'm gonna go off and find me a good flirting partner. You be good."

"Can't get into much trouble here, can I, Jack? You're my ride and I'll be tossed in the cage if I do something stupid."

"Good to know you realize it. Go find yourself a lady to flirt with or something. Meet back here in two hours, yeah?"

"Got it."

John sipped his drink and watched his partner wander off to the far side of the bar. He scanned the area, looking for anything he might like. Not that he was picky, not in the least.

"Buy you a drink?" The man in front of him was tall, with dusky skin and dark hair and eyes that both gleamed in the coloured lights. He smiled and shrugged. "You're pretty, and I'd love to have a little drink with you."

"Sure, why not?" John replied with a wink. The man winked back and got out of his seat to get the drinks.

"Name's Ked," the man told him when he sat back down with their drinks. "I drive interplanetary lorries and cargo."

"So why are you here?"

"Rest, relax, have a little fun. You know, same reason as you."

"How do you know why I was here?"

"I guessed. You're obviously a tourist. Seeing as how you look human and also not familiar with the place."

"Ah, I see. And you're not a tourist?"

"Well, I'm more of a regular tourist. I know the bartenders, I know the other regulars, but I don't live here."

"I see."

They fell into generic flirting, which John could do on autopilot. It was almost relaxing to just turn off his brain and respond the way he was expected in the social situation of bar-flirting with randoms. He didn't have to watch his back or keep alert. He could just zone out and fall back in his mind and feel comfortable.

"How about we head into the back?"

"Well," John felt reluctant. They were just supposed to flirt, after all. "I have a friend with me."

"So? He's not here. I'm sure he can take care of himself while we get off. I've got the money to pay for the room, it'll be on me."

The prospect was a bit tempting. He'd not had a proper lay since the botched job, and for him sex could be the most relaxing thing he could find that didn't cost him a grand in Standard money. And sex in a room he didn't have to pay for seemed pretty nice.

"Sure, I guess."

Ked grinned and beckoned John to follow. Crossing the bar, they stepped through a curtain into a lush red hallway. Ked stepped up to a window in the wall where a receptionist peered out at them.

He turned to John for a moment. "How long?"

"I don't care." The thought of getting laid was a nice one, now.

Ked turned back to the receptionist. "I'll pay for three hours. We might not use all of them, though."

"That's fine, sir. You have room 43C. Enjoy."

The hall was long and maze-like, twisting and turning and after about four turns, John realized that his head was spinning.

"Stop for a second. Stop." He leaned against the wall and put a hand to his forehead. He saw two of Ked leaning over him.

"You okay?"

"Dizzy. What's happened?" His brain felt like mush. Everything was blurry. Then suddenly everything was black.

He blinked groggily awake on a bed. For a moment this was a pleasant surprise. It was not so pleasant when he realized someone was manhandling his arms up to the head of the bed. Fear sang in his veins and clenched at his heart. Ked dropped on hand onto John's thigh, kneading and working his way up. John's stomach was in knots. His body felt heavy and sluggish, but he remembered at least some of his Time Agent training and swung a leg up and out, catching Ked in the kidney and swinging himself up enough to deliver a punch to the man's neck. Ked cried out and doubled over, head hanging over the bed. In a moment of desperation, John reached out and twisted, hearing a snap and a crunch, then Ked collapsed, sliding off the bed and onto the floor. John slumped back onto the bed, feeling his control of his body waning, all the strength seeping out, until he couldn't move any longer except to breathe and look about frantically with his eyes.

So he lies there and shakes, extra adrenaline having no escape since he's paralyzed. There's a dead man beside him, a dead man that just tried to rape him and there's nothing he can do but lie on the bed and think about it, one leg hanging off the bed, his arms at awkward angles, his shirt rucked up and trousers undone.

"John?" The door is the tiniest bit ajar, and Jack's voice comes echoing in. "John?"

He tries to make a sound, tries to move, but there's nothing he can do. Jack's footsteps pass his room and he wants to scream. But Jack seems to have instincts and senses far more accurate than John's own because the door opens and Jack is standing there wide-eyed and shocked.

"John? What's happened? Are you all right?" John follows Jack's movement with his eyes as his partner checks Ked for a pulse. Then he kneels over John and sniffs his mouth. "Paralyzing drug. Listen, John, it's okay. Unfortunately, it's very popular drug and anti-Agents like to use it so I've taken to carrying the antidote. Hang on."

John feels liquid sliding past his lips and down his throat. Moments later, his limbs are tingling and he can move again, slowly. His head aches. Jack pulls him upright and puts an arm around him.

"This is all my fault. I shouldn't have left you. I'm sorry. Are you all right?"

John pushes his partner away and stands shakily. "Get off me. I'm fine. Let's get out of here."

They leave the body there. As they step out into the main bar, John feels some sensation of defencelessness inside him snap, morphing instead into anger, into a need to commit violence or be better than that man, better at everything. He was damaged before. But he's ruined now, for goodness. Not much good lived in him in the first place, and now the bit of space for it has pulled itself apart with the adrenaline and terror and there's no way he can pull himself out of the madness and sadism and corruption he knows stands ahead of him. Not anymore.


End file.
